A rant about fortune and fate

I am saddened and shocked by the news story about a 24-year-old grad student who was brutally raped and murdered in New York. A random act of unspeakable and unimaginable violence that I normally try to block out of my life and my thoughts. It is the type of story which really hits home (literally) for me, since before moving out to Washington I spent most of my life in New York City, grew up in Brooklyn where her body was discovered, and used to play volleyball and basketball at John Jay College where she was getting her masters degree in criminology.

It is the type of news event that most tugs at my feral fears and disturbs my cloak of contentment. This is the stuff that shouldn't happen here, that shouldn't exist period. But when the objective nature of my mind is forced to contemplate this, it is obvious that this heinous event is not so rare on this planet of ours. Things like this happen every day around the world - it just doesn't usually happen here. If we look for it, we can find evidence of senseless suffering in Somalia, Bosnia, Cambodia...it can go on and on...and for most of us, we could not even begin to imagine, much less stomach.

As sad and maddening as this horrible tragedy is, what saddens me more is the knowledge that so many people who are as fortunate as I seem so oblivious to how lucky they are. For instance, there's a former colleague who seems unable to come to the realization that he's not the center of the universe, the cat's meow, or the most unique and creative individual on the face of the planet. And that it's okay to be just ordinary like the rest of us. It's not that he's lacking in intellect or talent, and it's not even that he seems to be "holding out" for the clear recognition of said talent and intellect careerwise. It's that he's been holding out for 5 years, AND totally unwilling to accept perfectly fitting work. We're not talking about flipping burgers at Mickey D's, although there's certainly no shame in that if it pays the rent.

What's probably the saddest part about this friend's state is that he continues to hold the same sanctimonious attitudes about the most silly things. For example this guy

• Refuses to wear anything other than jeans and sneakers, even wielding this personal preference as an excuse to avoid obligations to attend weddings and formal events
• Holds in disdain anyone who wears khakis, because in his view they are all corporate lackeys - even if they genuinely prefer this style of dress
  
• Thinks that if you don't live in New York City or London you can't truly be cool
• Sneers at anyone who professes a love for family and children

All the while, my friend seems oblivious to the fact that while he's been adrift for 5 years, the rest of the world has moved on.